Almost by Tamia

[Verse 1]
Can you tell me
How can one miss what she’s never had
How could I reminisce when there is no past
How could I have memories of being happy with you boy
Could someone tell me how can this be
How could my mind pull up incidents
Recall dates and times that never happened
How could we celebrate a love that’s to late
And how could I really mean the words I’m bout to say

[Chorus]
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it’s impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you

[Verse 2]
I cannot believe I let you go
Or what I should say I should’ve grabbed you up and never let you go
I should’ve went out with you
I should’ve made you my boo boy
Yes that’s one time I should’ve broke the rules
I should’ve went on a date
Should’ve found a way to escape
Should’ve turned a almost into
If it happened now its to late
How could I celebrate a love that wasn’t real
And if it didn’t happen why does my heart feel

[Chorus]
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it’s impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you

[Verse 3]
(sometimes I wanna rub ya, some nights I wanna hug ya)
And you seem to be the perfect one for me
You (some nights I wanna touch ya but tonight I wanna love ya)
You’re all that I ever wanted
And you’re my everything yes its true
Boy its hard to be close to you
My love
I know it may sound crazy
But I’m in love with you

[Chorus]
I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said it’s impossible to miss when you never had
Never almost had you

I missed the times that we almost shared
I miss the love that was almost there (sometimes I wanna rub ya)
I miss the times that we use to kiss
At least in my dreams
Just let me take my time and reminisce (but tonight I wanna love ya)
I miss the times that we never had
What happened to us we were almost there
Whoever said its impossible to miss when you never had
Never, never almost had you (but tonight I wanna love ya)

p/s: nothing will change about you and me. i accept that. very well indeed. this song is how i feel about you. lame and melodrama, i know

*Nothing much happen lately.

*I conclude that 2nd semester are the worst time for me. Like last year, i got my first 5 for Process Principle. This year, i got my first Conceded Pass for Thermodynamics. I am hoping that i won’t get my first Fail by next year. I just can’t digest that unit. Seriously. I thank God for that CP. It could have been worst, like supp or fail. Gonna redeem it back next semester. It surely drag down my average to 70.81. Huhu. How la to graduate First Class cam ya. 2nd Class Upper pun belum tentu.

*Still not working yet. Abah suruh duduk rumah for December. If i want to work, maybe January. December has alot of stuff to do. Hangouts and weddings and birthdays and i don’t have any money at all and i’m stress about that.

*Went to dentist in Section 7, had lunch at PPUM with Areen, went to IIUCT with Ben. Nice day out

*Hangout with Iskandar, Fadzrel, Emir, Zul and Ben on Thursday night. Discussing about the small gathering. Penat weh plan, seriously. Over here, we have to meet each other every holiday. Kinda routine.

*Going to Mas’s Engagement tomorrow. I think i’ll get to see my present from Boo as well. I miss him

*by next week, another plan has been made. Just wait and see.

without wax,

yours truly in moneyless state

I stumbled upon this good blog when i was looking for the old pic of Leonardo DiCaprio…huhu.

i’m just a human being

I think he likes football i guess….somehow i can relate the way he (i assume) tries to describe things just like my brother. Straight to the point, reflective and honest.

If my brother has a blog la….hahaha. But i don’t think so….

p/s: blog about the result and some other things that i saw for past couple of days later. Till then, enjoy the new blog that i found

Current Mood: Sakit gigi. Damn it!

Current Song: Mama Do (Uh Oh Uh Oh) by Pixie Lott

Thursday, 3 December 2009.

Went to FRIM with my USJian chicas. We had jungle walking and picnic. Me, my twin and Nisa didn’t complete the jungle walking journey. Haha. All of us wore unsuitable cloth for the occasion actually because all of us thought that the jungle walking has its own track, as in a really proper track. Turned out that the track was even horror than Lambir jungle tracking, as well as the difficulties of the track. But my other chicas walk it through tho. Awesome day indeed!

us frm Alina's view

us from Ika's view

they made it to the top

Mardiah & Nisa

Ika & Alina

me & my twin

Khadijah

Nabilah

Saturday, 5 December 2009.

My Mak Su Elly’s wedding at Ipoh. Met all my grandparents and uncles and aunts. It was awesome!. Mak Su Elly is my dad’s cousin. Her mother is my late grand father’s sister. Since my grandparents passed away, so its my dad duty to attend all the official occasion of the family. My late grandfather was the eldest of the family and my dad was their only son. So, you can imagine me being the first grandchild of the family. Everyone loves me. No doubt. Haha. Sometimes, its kinda pressure on me you know, or maybe it happens in Perakian family or maybe in Banjar family. Yes, i am Banjar. Huhu.

Mommy & Opah Ani

Mak Su Liza, Opah Ani, Makcik Jaja, Mak Su Tijah

Pak Long Azim, Bro Dearie, Pak Su Shairy

Atuk Busu and Co.

the Haji Yusof's family (sons and daughters and grandchildrens)

Pak Su & Mak Su Elly

Opah Su

Pak Long Faizal

That’s all from me this week. We shall see what next week lay out for me. First thing to worry is the exam result. Huhu. I can feel the cuakness. Second, i MUST find part time work. I need money weh. Seriously. Haha. I think i gonna meet my Sayang this week. Can’t wait for my present, this time for my Boo. Hehe. No more sharing. I think its gonna be another bear. Bear collections! yeay! Mas’s engagement on Saturday. I don’t know how to get to her house. Huhu. Maybe i’ll be going with TC.

That’s all for last week. Wish all the best for my Curtinian family’s exam result. I hope i pass my Thermodynamics and PIC. That’s all i want. Pass! Please dearie God!

Anxiously waiting for this week,

without wax,

yours truly

Current Mood: Still sakit nak ketawa banyak2

Current Song: 3 by Britney Spears

Kinda funny when my mom said, ‘Hp ko x berbunyi, xde org nak ajak ko keluar ke?’…haha. Mak aku perli aku rupenye. Well, she forgot that her daughter is so popular. With just a call, she can have whoever she wants to hangout with her. Haha (berlagaknye bunyi but betul tu). I was going to be a bit hommie this time around, nak tolong mak duduk rumah, jadi maid tak bergaji, just that the problem is mak saya pun tak nak saya duduk rumah je. Macam mane tu..haha. Thus, i had 2 straight days of melepak with my primary school members. Without fail, tiap kali balik, i shall have my moment with them. Ade je stories nak kena report back to me. That’s the best part being me (again, berlagak lg but betul). Haha.

Sunday, 29 November 2009.

1st day of lepak. That evening suppose to be only me and Izzat je. I texted him a day before because i dreamt about him. Mimpi yang jenis orang couple dream about their love ones. Camtu la aku mimpi pasal Izzat. Kinda weird kan. I know. I was shocked kot after bangun dari mimpi tu. But i think it makes sense la because i didn’t get to meet him during my winter holiday though. So, i told him i’m going to lepak2 with him. He came to my house. We lepak kat the basketball court near my house. After talk for about 2 hours, i was thinking to go somewhere else. Then, the idea pop up. Calling all the crews that already here. 1st, Ben. Die baru sampai rumah from Muar when i called him. Terus on. Haha. 2nd, my bf Iskandar. ‘Perempuan’ tu kat kampung. Tak balik lagi. Next was Azman Afiq. Mamat putih ni cukup la susah nak ajak die lepak. Sumpah tak tipu pasti. Haha. After that, called Ketot. Die pun baru balik from jalan2. I called her because i didn’t get to hangout out with her twice, during the Valentine day and during my winter break. She’s on as well. Next on the list, Faiz. Lepas tu, Areen and Fairous. Areen on but Fairous pegi rumah makcik die. Siot sungguh minah itu. Ended up only 6 of us, me, Ben, Areen, Ketot, Faiz and Izzat. Lepak kat Darussalam, SS 15. Gelak tak ingat dunia. Macam2 la cerita yang keluar. Cerita Ketot yang xleh blah skali. Haha. I can’t tell it here but mmg that girl is just a berani mati girl i tell you. Haha.

Areen & Ketot

Faiz & Ben

Izzat, lelaki yg ku mimpi (minus his new hair, gonna ask him to chop it off)

Monday, 30 November 2009.

Announcement of having fun the day before in facebook makes few of my friends that i know are here, at home but i just forgot to call, jealous. Haha. Oleh kerana itu, i decided to call for another day of lepak. This time consists of Fadhil, Sufi, Ayeep, Fadzrel, Ben, Faiz, Hidayah & her bf, Fairous and me. Actually, its Dayah idea sebenarnye. She went to Poland when she was 15 and just get back 1 year ago. She didn’t get to go to the ultimate reunion before. Since she insists to meet, i called up few peoples that i missed to bring during the Sunday part. Well, kali ni sangat la best mengenakan Hidayah @ Pae. Die tak ingat member…haha. Memang la kena bahan tahap yg aku rase org2 kat Melur USJ 16 tu nak baling makanan kat muka kitorg kot. Me, Ben and Faiz just can’t laugh anymore.

Hidayah @ Pae & bf nye

Sufi & Ayeep

Ben & Fadzrel

Fadhil & Faiz

Rous & the ugliest me

That’s all for now. Eid was fun. Like always. Helped my mom cooked and do abit of chores. Trust me. I am a very lazy woman on earth if you ask me to do house work. Helped my dad on his working stuff. Helped my brother yg pecah kepala to choose his university. Well, i do the easy work la kan. Haha.

If the plan fall through, i will be having picnic on Thursday with my USJian clan at FRIM. Gonna do some walking in the jungle…haha. Friday, will be meeting an agent for my brother’s uni stuff and go Ipoh to attend my Maksu Elly’s wedding. Next weekeed, my best babe, Mas bertunang. Next next weekend, planning of reunion. Final weekend of the month, my cousion, Kak Long Ecah’s wedding. So basically, my December weekend are fully booked. You guys have weekdays to visit me ok! hehe.

I will have problem with money this time around because i have no job until today. I don’t think i gonna do my internship this time because its too late already. I might just as well enjoy the holiday. Hehe. But will be looking for part time work soon. I need money to shop!

Exam result will be release soon. Saya dah pasrah. I already told my family of the possibility repeating one unit but i hope i don’t. Just give me a suppliment paper enough. I’ll work hard on that supp paper. Please dear God. Or just give me a pass of 5. I don’t dare ask for more.

Well, that’s all from me. See you guys soon.

Without wax,

your truly in state of mixing emotion

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some of the songs here are cover version. I can’t listen to the old version because it doesn’t suit my taste well. Kinda like the cover version. Hehe. Have fun

1) Can’t Take My Eyes of You – Lauryn Hill feat. The Fugees

2) Killing Me Softly – The Fugees

3) Shackles (Praise You) – Mary Mary

4) Careless Whisper - Dave Koz & Montell Jordan

5) Big Big World – Emilia

6) I Will Survive – Cake

7) Sunshine – Gabrielle

Stay The Same – Joey McIntyre

Current Mood: Home!

Current Song: Russian Roulette by Rihanna

Finally, after 12 days in Miri, here i am, at my most safest place of all, Mi Casa

The family’s good. My dad picked me up at the airport. He lost weight again. I hugged him like i never hug him before. Miss papa bear alot. Chat the whole way, joined by Roy on the morning breakfast before he headed to LCCT for his next flight to Kedah. Then, both of us went to my brother’s college, settle up some of his stuff. There’s nothing change in him. Same old same old. Had Subway for lunch before went back home. Met mama bear later in the evening. She’s losing weight as well. Its kinda scary when almost all your family member lost few pounds when you the only left, who added extra spare tyre. But thank God i’m not the only one in the family who gain weight. All my cats are fat too. They eat alot!

The flight was ok. It’s a new experience to me because i never had a morning flight before. I bumped into one of my primary school junior, working as the flight attendance! I was shocked, in the good way though. She’s 20 and working while i’m 21 and still figuring out the difference between vapor and gas. Haha.

My wish came true when 2 of my favourite guy sent me to the airport, my Abang and Gorgeous. I really wish it would come true and it does. I had my night before the flight with Abang. We talked like we always do before the end of semester. But i didn’t cry. I was going to actually but Abang just too clever, picked up the hint of me going to burst out in tear and changed our conversation subject. Haha. I’m gonna miss both of the guy alot. Really alot. I can’t put in words how thankful i am to have both of them in my life, regardless whatever happen. Huhu. It’s really hard to find a friend that you can trust and do anything for you. I met Sedut before my flight as well. Gonna miss that guy too. 5722 people has been really good to me for the past 3 years. Fariq, Sedut, Khadab, Syabil, Gapam, Chendoy and their allies. Will miss all of them after next year.

Well, that’s it for Miri this time around. I hope it will be a different story next year with different people.

till next year of Miri

without wax,

yours truly in missing people state

Choose to wear good cloths

Choose to put on make ups

Choose to understand what you’ve read

Choose to remember what you’ve learnt

But the most important is choose to be happy for yourself, not for anyone else, not for being happy for someone else.

Hang on to whatever that you have with you, not with the things that already gone.

I listened to all these while i was sitting on top of him yesterday night…crying

Quickie update people! (Lazy to write a long post for now)

*I’ll be heading home on 25 november, 6.20 am flight. That will be roughly 2 days more before i go back to mi mami and mi papi in good gracious state…hehe. I so can’t wait to go back!!!

*I went to campus for few reasons after the exam ended. 1st, to borrow books, which i have 2 more to finish. 2nd, pre-meeting of CFC new board member, which i can see a glimpse of hope in somewhere that next sem will impose some few appropriate changes to the league. Gonna settle up all the remaining stuff tomorrow. Huhu.

*Almost done with packing. I just looking for the means to transport my stuff over to the storage house. Will think about it soon. Huhu.

*I suppose to hangout out alot with Abang, Sedut and Syabil but i didn’t. Kinda weird for me to just sit at home and watched movies. Well, they’re busy with their housemates and friends anyway. I’m not in their social calendar date. Hehe.

*I watched few good old movie this time. GI Jane was simply awesome. I love Demi Moore to the max in the movie. A Few Good Man is really spellbinding. Tom Cruise in it!. I watched  The Bodyguard as well. Kevin Costner and Whitney Houston. Epic weh…hehe

*Did some socializing activities. Play basketball on last last friday. Went to E-Fact Alumni Gathering at Taman Awam. Had steamboat and karaoke session. Its been awhile since my batch had sat and talk together. Teringat zaman foundation dulu. Such a sweet time. By next year, all of you graduate and leave me for a semester to go (hopefully). Went to Puan Hashimah’s house. Abg Amno did some makan2 for the people who graduating this sem. Best weh makan. Haha. Went to Balcony later that night with Mia, her ex bf, Nadea and Abang. My goodness! I dance like never dance for. Haha. A bit embarrassing to me though. Seriously, deep inside me, i’m a shy person and lack of self-confident kinda girl. But, i don’t usually portray that part of me most of the time. Hehe.

Well, that’s about it.

without wax,

yours truly in exciting stage of going home

I just realised that i have so many confessions this year. Weird is it? Haha. But i think this one gonna be the most utterly truth of all.

I have problem. Yeah, so does everyone else right?. What makes you and i have a common problem but you have the solution while i don’t?

I have problem with people’s impression towards me. That’s the biggest thing ever for me. I like to think that people do love me for all means. Seriously, i never thought that people are going to talk bad about me because i never do anything bad to them. This thought seriously never occur to me until one day, a close friend of mine asked me, ‘ko rasekan ade x org kutuk ko belakang ko?’ That was the moment i felt like how many good deeds i’ve done to all my friends, it won’t stop them to talk shit about me if they want to.

I usually have negative 1st impression towards people. I think that’s why i have problem with people’s impression towards me. I try as much as i can to be good, to look good in front of all people. I will only let you into my darkest secret if i can only trust you because it is hard for me to trust a person.

By doing so, am i being hypocrite?