Dear diary day 2

We went to Danga Bay yesterday. That’s our normal place to talk about us, our life and direction.

I was given an ultimatum yesterday. It was the first time I knew that he was devastated about Boboy. He was devastated about Miri. He clearly mentioned he was disappointed in me. I had my fair share too but I know no matter what I said, i’m in the wrong side.

He was right about everything he said. About truth and honesty and trust. I did betrayed his trust after our last biggest fight (my bday), where he was about to leave me completely. I begged for a chance. But here I am, destroying it again.

I only have until end of this year to turn 50-50 ratio to 80-20. I am still in debt with him because of what happen in Miri. I wish I was not that selfish. Yes, he mentioned I’m selfish. I just want to get myself happy and be in control. I’m totally wrong.

He told me I’m the best in treating him they way he should be treated as a bf and I’m trying hard to be what he wants me to be (better than what I am currently) but what I couldn’t do is take care of his heart. That’s where I lost him.

I will get back his heart. He is my life. No matter what happen, I’ll get him back.

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